IMAGICISE: Dungeon Dwelling

PROMPT: Describe a different sort of dungeon.

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Crave’s Example:

Not all dungeons are dark and dingy, scary and stingy. Some are quite pretty! Well, at least one was. Oh yes, it’s true, it’s quite true. There was once a girl, she wasn’t a princess, yet she wasn’t that poor. She was an heir you see, but she was one of nine. So when the time had come for her elders to say goodbye, her and her eight brothers and sisters were given their piece of the castle pie. The first got the gold, the second the horses, the third the navy, the fourth the food, the fifth the jester, the sixth a wardrobe of exotic dresses and gowns, the seventh received lands in vast countries, the eighth was given the castle grounds, but what was left for the little girl. Well, the dungeon! “Oh my!” she said as she toured the moping, crying, and ghastly grounds. We need to spice this up! And indeed she did. But in fact, she made the dungeon so cute, that it was even more torturous than before for those who entered. [ 5 mins, 179 words]

IMAGICISE: Bearded Princess

PROMPT: There once was a bearded princess…

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Crave’s Example:

              There once was a bearded princess, and unhappy she was. It all began when she was just a little girl. One morning a hair appeared on her chin. She wanted it removed immediately, but a wise woman warned her. “For each hair you remove, two more will take its place.”

              So it began. For years, the princess snipped, cut, pulled, torched, waxed her facial hairs, and just as the wise woman promised, soon twins would sprout up. And now, the princess had a thick forest of folicles. There was nothing in the mortal world that could shave this beard, except of course for a magic razor. The wise woman had spoke about an ancient razor born out of love. Long ago, there was a maiden prized for her long locks of hair. Suitors from all across the land came to ask for her hand in marriage. But she knew they only loved her for her hair. Though she loved herself, and sought the aid of a wizard. He then gave her the magical razor, which she used to shave her head once and for all. The suitors left, but she was free to pursue life at her leisure. Though, no man would marry her. Still, she used her days to explore the vast lands, and journeyed days, months, and years to the farthest corners of the imagination. It is in the farthest point in the Hollow Caves of the North Sea, where she was finally laid to rest, alone but happy. It has been spoken, that the razor rests in these caves.

              So the bearded princess decreed that whomever obtains the magical razor will have her hand in marriage. Many men saddled up and went on the quest, though it was a dangerous trek and would take many years to reach the cave. However, there was one man. A local boy who grown up with the princess. He admired her, and loved her natural beauty. “Princess, I care not that you have a beard, I love you all the same, please marry me!”

              Though the princess too admired this man, she was unable to love herself as he did. So many years she waited in the castle, alone and unhappy. Then finally, one day a man had returned with the razor, though it was too late, she was an old woman and had died in her sleep, with the full beard in tact. [10 mins – 403 words]

IMAGICISE: No legs

PROMPT:  Once upon a time there was a man with no legs…

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Crave’s Example:

Once upon a time there was a man with no legs. His name was Emmett. One morning, Emmett went for a jog. In the afternoon, he stood in line at the post office. And in the evening, he performed stand-up comedy. It was easy for him, on account of his missing legs. Well, they weren’t exactly missing. He knew where they were. And so did the ghost. Quite a spell ago, a neighboring poltergeist had invited him to a poker game in the afterworld. Emmett wasn’t exactly a card shark, but he certainly knew his way around the table. This natural skill upset a rather feisty ghost who desired to take the game to a higher level. The cocky ghost challenged Emmett to a personal wager. Emmett didn’t have enough to challenge the ghost’s “all in” call, but having plenty of time to strategize in the after his death the ghost was one step ahead.

“Throw in your legs and we’re even,” said the ghost. Emmett looked at his cards and thought he stood an honest chance of winning with his straight flush. But, unbeknownst to him, royal blood flushed the ghost that day and he took the pot including Emmett’s legs.

“But how will I walk around?” asked Emmett.

“Here,” said the ghost as he handed him his legs. Those at the game though only the ghost walked away a winner. They were wrong. Both of them did. Perhaps that was what the ghost had in mind all along.

For the ghost may have stud at the card table, but in the world of haunting he was a dud. No matter how many hours he spent hiding, crawling, sneaking, and booing he just never seemed to frighten his designated hauntees. But when he got his human legs, that all changed. For you see, Emmet sported quite the lead feet. This had bothered him for some time. It made long walks feel like an epic adventure, and exercise, well that was certainly out of the question. But worst of all, was his shoes. For there wasn’t a shoe maker in town who offered a size 19 and ½. Luckily, for the ghost he felt no pain, and certainly didn’t mind the dirt, bugs, and scabs. Especially, when little children and adults aliked gasped at the sight of the approaching giant legs. It was haunting heaven for the ghost, for he never had to plan a spook again. He merely walked his way around town, filled his daily quote and then spent the evening snacking on cheese and crackers as he watched the boats come into the harbor.

As for Emmett, his dead legs were life savers. He could exercise and never once had to worry about the appearance of his shoe-less feet. Emmett learned a valuable lesson at that poker game. Even if you don’t play the right hand, you may get a better set of legs. [10mins – 487 words]

IMAGICISE: Rapunzel / Lancelot

PROMPT: What if your name was….

Gentlemen: Rapunzel   /   Ladies: Lancelot

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Crave’s Example:

If my name was Rapunzel I’m sure at some point in my youth my parents would have payed someone to let me lie on their couch, and as an adult, medicare would be fronting the bill. I hope my street skills would have led me in the search of a nickname. Though that could be difficult. A play off of “Pun” comes to mind, but “Big Pun” and “The Punisher” are already taken. I’m not exactly a heavyset rap artist, and I certainly don’t know enough about comics to steal an iconic heroe’s name. Oh well…let’s see. What about “R-Rated,” while my potty mouth would get me through the door people would assume such a rating would include nudity, and I don’t want to have to have to perform community service. So all I can think of is, “RZ Cola” but I don’t what specifically constitutes me as being carbonated. Though my hyperactivity would vouge for the caffeine. So maybe I would just go for the old route of using my middle name. James it is! I often think about what it would be like to have a horrid nickname, so here are some “they can’t be good,” nicknames.

• Backup
• Why Not?
• The President of the United States of America
• Lord of the Turds
• Sir Smellypants
• Captain Jerkface
• USS Fatty McMuffin

I’m not too sure this list is cutting it. I wonder though how many lads named Rapunzel would actually grow their hair out. At least then there’s a reason for their name and they could play it off as a nickname. But then again I wonder how many would be drawn to “play for the other team.” I guess we’ll only know once people start naming their newborn baby boys Rapunzel. I’d like to start that movement, but I think it will be years before any woman lets me get anywhere close to being a father. [5mins – 324 words]